Journal Portion 6

It is amazing to me the wisdom and foresight of our church leaders, apostles, and prophets.  For decades they have warned of the devastating effects of pornography on individuals, marriages, and families.  I have always believed in this counsel, but now I am sincerely feeling the pain that they warn of when they counsel members of the church to avoid pornography in all of its forms.  It has completely destroyed everything that was holy, sacred, and good in my marriage.

My husband's deceptive pornography use has destroyed the bonds of trust that we worked so hard to create.  Where love once was, now there is only hurt and despair.  A relationship that was once my greatest joy is now my greatest pain.  My heart aches for the many women who have gone through this experience and for those who will feel the effects of the poor decisions of others in the future.  

I have always known that our decisions will always affect others, especially the ones that we love.  How foolish it is to think that are decisions ever only affect ourselves.  I wish I could warn anyone and everyone of the devastating consequences of viewing pornography.  I know my husband's soul has been tattered by its influence.  Now, as his wife, I am suffering more than imaginable.